Monday, November 13, 2006

The Shape Of Awsomeness

I am here to tell you, people, what the most awsome thing in the universe is. And that is:

THA CAST IRON SKILLET, YO! Now some people might not be down with da SEA-EYE-ESS. They might say "I put my bacon in it and turn it on, and the center cooks but the outside stays raw!"


To these people I say: The Skillzet is from another time, G. You gotta know how it works. It takes time to make a thing go right, and it takes time to heat up the IRON. Turn on your burner. Put the skillet in place. Then go thaw your bacon, or get those cherry turnovers started, or go smooch on your wife since she's prolly still layin around in bed anyway. When you come back, throw that bacon in the C.I.S. and WHAA-CHOW that biz is cooked, yo. Once the skillet is hot there is NO STOPPING IT. Bacon. Eggs. A turkey. Your dog. Jackie Chan. The cast iron will FRY THAT **** UP and you can't even slow it down. Your bacon will be perfectly cooked, end to freakin end.


FURTHERMORE when you are sitting at the table and you gotta lean way back because you are full of the breakfasty goodness and your wife is like "You gonna do the dishes?" You can be like "Aw, shuga, we gotta let the skillet cool off before we can clean it." She won't believe you. But the skillet will be uncomfortably warm to the touch for a good half hour. Even after you dump a couple cups of cold water in it (water that is now hot, greasy, and splashing on you). Add to that the fact that it weighs like 30 pounds and the idea of maneuvering it around in the sink will be right out. This leaves you time to socialize with your breakfast guests, if you have any, or make out with your wife if there are no guests. Either way, perfect morning - courtesy of the CAST IRON SKILLET!


2 comments:

Melinite said...

Marcus, I hope you're happy, now!

P said...

You can buy Cast Iron Skillet cozies to put around the skillet handle (like a little pot holder that wraps around) so you can transfer it away from the stove top heat and over to a hot plate on the counter top. (The hot plate to keep it from scorching the top of your counter) This helps to speed up cool-down time so you can clean the pan quicker.

IJS.

wsffc?

Why Settle for Filthy Cast-Iron?