4.3 or, The Goodbye Month

Dear Corbin,

It is a time of "last."  The last weeks of school.  The last time playing at the apartment.  The last time we go to our usual stores and our usual restaurants.  The last of our patience with each other.  You and I, boy-o, we have gotten good at driving each other crazy.  I don't blame you; life is hard for you right now.  Your stuff is all packed up.  Your dad has been gone for over a month.  Your house is all different.  Your people are stressed out and unhappy and yelling at each other.  You said to me the other night, "I want our house to go back to normal."  Me, too, sweetie-pie.  Me, too.

One night, after a frustrating bed time process, we had this conversation:

C: I settled down now.
M: Yeah.  We really got each other upset, didn't we?
C: Yeah.
M: Maybe we need a magic word.  Then when we're driving each other crazy, we can say the magic word and then we can both calm down.
C: Maybe a princess could help us.
M: ....  What would a princess say?
C: She would give us a time out.
M: Oh.  That might be good advice.
C: Yeah.
M: So the next time we're driving each other crazy, we'll have a princess time out?
C: Yeah.

You throw fits because you don't get your way about things, and I know that you're desperately trying to feel that you are in control of something.  Beware this feeling.  I am entirely familiar with it, and I absolutely sympathize.  But it is very easy to become overwhelmed with trying to be in control.  It is easy to waste your time and energy worrying about things that might happen.  Do your research, yes.  Do your planning, yes.  Do not spend your life waiting for the thing that is going to go wrong.  Something will always go wrong.  Teach yourself how to adjust and adapt, even though it makes you angry or scared or tired.  Learn the value of saying, "Next time I will..." instead of, "I wish I had...."  Having experience and understanding is far better than having control.  Control you can lose, but you can only ever gain experience and understanding.

I wish I had more fun things to talk about, but it's going to have to wait until next month.

Love,
Mom